Thursday, September 1, 2011

You know you're at back to school night when . . .

. . . your child’s 4th grade teacher returns a necklace to you and says “I had to take this from your child because I warned her and warned her, but she was just so wiggly and kept playing with it.”  Clearly this teacher has not yet spoken with the 1st, 2nd and 3rd grade teachers.  Otherwise she would have had adequate warning about Superego’s “wigglyness”.  It’s gonna be a loooooong year.  At back to school night it really hit home just how close together in age our kids are – K, 2nd and 4th grades.  Whose idea was that?!  Is it too late to change that?!  I think my head is spinning with all the things I have to remember .  .  . and the fun has only just begun.
So, here’s how you know you’re at back to school night:
1)      Your left butt cheek is the only part of your body that can actually fit on the seat that you’ve just been asked to sit in for the next hour.

2)      You are sitting at your 4th grader’s desk and you see on the back of her desk’s nameplate the following:
a.       Pepperoni
b.      White Fang
c.       Going to Legoland for 10 hours
d.      My Dad
               Of course, you ask “what are these items on the back of the nameplate” and the teacher says:
a.       Favorite Pizza topping
b.      Favorite book
c.       Favorite summer memory
d.      Favorite person
Damnit, got burned by that one.  It’s ok, I’ve got the Kindergartener in the bag.  We’ll just have to flip for the middle one.
3)      The kindergarten teacher asks that when you send in toys for share day, that they please have an “off switch”.  Does that apply to the children that we send in too?!
I decided that tomorrow I’m going to get back into the “Family Fun” swing.  Found out today that the Superego (4th grader) has a 1 book a week reading assignment.  Ok, if this was an assignment for mommy, I’d be screwed.  I can’t remember the last time I read something more than a People magazine.  I would fail the 4th grade.  But, I’m going to be a supportive mommy (plus I need some “family fun”) and therefore I decided we will walk to the library and get a Jamba Juice.  Who wants to make bets that we actually make it to Jamba Juice before mommy has to take it away because the Trifecta misbehaved?!  Stay tuned. . .

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