Wednesday, April 4, 2012

"Are you watching these children?!"

. . . was the question from the very irritated and judgmental man who almost ran my children over in the Target parking lot!  “YEEEEEEEESSSS!” was my defensive and embarrassed response. 

It’s Spring Break and my “oh sh*t, I’m a stay at home mommy” hives have kicked in.  I have to entertain the children all day and maintain some semblance of my sanity.  It’s gonna be a long week.  But, on the bright side, Camp Runamuk is in full swing.

Here’s what I learned about “watching the children”:


1)      When the man in the Target parking lot is rightfully pissed off at you and your children because neither you nor they were paying very good attention, you really need to come up with better comeback than “YEEEEEEESSSS!”  How about something like “I’m not sure I can watch them anymore; would you like to take them home?!”  And no, I’m not trying to make light of needing to closely watch your children in a parking lot.  I’m simply making all the mommies feel better about their CPS moments.  Admit it, we’ve all had them!!
 

2)      When you start your Camp Runamuk activities with a hike, don’t forget that what goes down, must come up.  Who would have thought that a hike DOWN a trail to the beach would require us to then walk back UP the trail to get home?!  The children actually asked if we “had to hike all the way back up” and without skipping a beat my girlfriend and I said “of course, do you think there’s a helicopter that will come take you out of here?!”  If only . . .


No, the Superego did not all of a sudden change ethnicities. She was being a little sh*t and refused to be in the picture. So, we have our neighbor as a stand in who was more than happy to pose!


3)      When the trailhead says “Beach Trail”, they really do mean that you will eventually end up at the beach.  Oh, and when it also adds “No food allowed”, they mean that too.  Mommy wasn’t quite prepared for the children to get soaking wet and then have to hike ALLLLLLL THEEEEEEE WAAAAAAAY BAAAAAACK TOOOOO THEEEEEE CARRRRR (just imagine the whining magnified by 9) in the middle of lunch time.  Sh*t!  My girlfriend and I brought nine kids between us and decided to take them into a place where there’s a huge body of salt water and no food allowed.  What the f*&% were we thinking?!  Oh, that’s right, it was a way to get out of the house and wear them out.  Well, it was worth it!
At least the Ego (she's in the orange and the sweatpants rolled up so far I think they've given her a wedgie) had the sense to roll up her pants before she went in.  (The Supergo is there in the Blue worrying about a little salt water on her brand new Guess outfit - from Costco, by the way - who knew?!)  BTW, I have no idea what that lady in the foreground is doing, but it was probably yelling at the kids who were running amuk (mine included)!!!
Recommendations for today –

1)      Keep those leashes for two year olds in your car at all times; you will probably need them in parking lots until the children are at least 12;

2)      The Beach Trail hike at Torrey Pines State Reserve (or any beautiful hike, for that matter)

2 comments:

  1. Heather - you never cease to amaze me!

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  2. Still giggling...

    amy @ whilewearingheels.blogspot.com

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