As I know is true with all mommies, the last two weeks I have been lost in the vortex of my crazy life, including girl scout cookie hell, and have had absolutely no time to write about it. I have, however, had time to keep up with the Bachelor (a girl can’t give up all her guilty pleasures).
Today, I found 15 minutes, so in honor of Valentines Day and finding amazing, incredible, true love (only true Bachelor fans will appreciate that reference), I decided to share a few of our family Valentine hits and misses (technically some of these were anniversary gifts, but I thought them fitting to share at this time too).
And, of course, to get in the spirit, I had to pull this 2010 photo out of the family archive.
Here’s what I’ve learned about best intentions for those holidays that are invented by Hallmark:
1) If your husband is obsessed with Costco so much so that if Costco doesn’t sell it, it shouldn’t exist; and if that same husband ever gives you a Little Blue Box (oh yes ladies, I mean THAT blue box), cross your fingers that he doesn’t follow it up with a box from Costco. Here’s what MIGHT happen: Your husband will say to you “honey, I bought you two rings . . . one from Tiffany’s and one from Costco. The rings were both the same price, and after you see the rings, you get to pick which one you keep.” Let’s just say that I had to give back that little blue box because inside that little blue box was a ring with very teeny tiny little diamonds. In the Costco box, however, was an equally beautiful ring with much bigger diamonds. The moment I selected the Costco box, husband from heaven knew we would be together forever!!! Every time I look at that ring I get a chuckle at my husband’s great lawyering tactics to get me to pick the Costco ring!! Beware of this tactic ladies!
2) When your husband orders flowers from a 1-800 vendor, you may want to tell him to make sure that the flowers come to you assembled. Every one knows how much credit I give Husband from Heaven, and this is no exception. However, when the enormous 2 foot box arrives at your office and it requires you to assemble your gift, it takes away a bit of the beauty and “aaaaaah” moment! (I really SUCK at flower arranging, and they just didn’t turn out the way they looked in the picture). And don’t get me started on trying to get the d@mn thing home! I know, I know, at least he tried!
3) When your husband has a sailboat and you think that it will be a great idea to purchase something that you found online that you thought would be really cute, make sure that “something” is not a “ball of dishes”. I thought it would be so clever to get him a picnic set that he could have on the boat and that was stored in a plastic ball container (think those plastic balls that you put hamsters or your kids’ zhu zhu pets in). It was easy to store, it floated and it just looked cool. Well, let’s just say that I might as well have bought him a yearlong subscription to Home and Garden magazine and an invitation to a Tupperware party. Apparently they looked a bit feminine and there was NO WAY they were getting on that boat. They did survive in the garage for about 3 years before I finally accepted defeat and gave them away!
There are so many more stories like these, but rather than continue to create them, Husband from Heaven and I have now given up on Valentine gifts. He just buys me flowers (already in the vases) and I make him some kind of valentine cookies, cake, pie, etc. It’s easy and it leaves less opportunity for the other person to make fun of you for the duration of your marriage!